‘Amerika’ 2018

I have too long been silent, remiss in expressing myself here. I have not been depressed, but I have greatly limited my exposure to news and commentary. I have almost desperately fled the depressing news of the moral decay of America. I have tried to become a regular practitioner of daily prayer and meditation, my focus on personal change. There comes a time that “even the stones cry out”.

America’s busyness, its preoccupation with wealth and success, its religious hypocrisy (prosperity theology) has made many of its citizens blind to the needs of others and the spirit of the gospel. Politics has long been a dirty business, but has sunk to a morally bankrupt level. As long as we have financial success we care not for our own fragile environment, for our long-standing allies, or for “your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. . .the homeless, tempest-tossed. . .” We build walls and separate families and children.

Today’s reading, from the Letter of St. James, reads:

My brothers and sisters, do you with your acts of favoritism really believe in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ? For if a person with gold rings and in fine clothes comes into your assembly, and if a poor person in dirty clothes also comes in, and if you take notice of the one wearing the fine clothes and say, “Have a seat here, please,” while to the one who is poor you say, “Stand there”, or, “Sit at my feet,” have you not made distinctions among yourselves, and become judges with evil thoughts? Listen, my beloved brothers and sisters. Has not God chosen the poor in the world to be rich in faith and to be heirs of the kingdom that he has promised to those who love him? But you have dishonored the poor. Is it not the rich who oppress you? Is it not they who drag you into court? Is it not they who blaspheme the excellent name that was invoked over you?

You do well if you really fulfill the royal law according to scripture, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you show partiality, you commit sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors. . .For judgment will be without mercy to anyone who has shown no mercy; mercy triumphs over judgment.”

Readers and students of history remember that prosperity, albeit false, came to Germany, lifting it from the Great Depression. It came with a regime that persecuted not only Jews, but the handicapped, the outcasts, those that did not fit the mold of what the powers deemed proper. It came with militarism. It came with National Socialism, Nazism, which seems to be the political wind of today, though not called such in our media, financial or polite circles. First, the Nazis persecuted the minorities and the helpless, then their own people.

Are America’s border walls meant to keep people out or its citizens in?

 

Hypocrisy

I am a hypocrite, which I hate in myself and in others. I return to a theme that often what we hate in others is the fact that we see our faults more clearly in them.

HYPOCTRITE – from Greek for actor; a person who puts on a false appearance of virtue or religion; a person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs or feelings.

There are the obvious hypocrites: the evangelists who fervently preach the gospel, but live in palatial homes, drive luxury automobiles and fly private jets: The Gospel of Reward Me While on Earth Because I Believe. Now where was that in Jesus’ teaching??? I don’t seem to recall that. Nor in the Buddha, nor in any truly spiritual teacher.

Some years ago there was extreme outrage over the abuse of the bodies of slain American soldiers in the streets of Somalia. The mistreatment rightly called for outrage. Yet, at almost the same time the History Channel repeatedly aired footage of our Iraqi invasion, including flaming Iraqi tanks and vehicles. The footage played like a video game, rather than the real life destruction of human life that it was.

We have many adamant pro-life advocates. Understandable, but many of those same people seem unaware and uncaring of the plight of children and the poor. Birth, but then you are on your own.

America is a nation of hypocrites. We claim to be built upon freedom of expression and tolerance, yet stifle opposing views. We claim to be a nation of immigrants, but are suspicious and intolerant of those who are different. Our self-perception is one of education and knowledge, but we glean our news from shallow sources and rumor. We seek to reinforce our views rather than challenge them. We claim to be peace-loving, but have been at war virtually my entire life. Eisenhower, a most respected general, seems to have been our most diligent president in recognizing the threat of war and the power of the military-industrial complex. How many of our leaders since him have been flag lapel wearing, stand at attention for the anthem hypocrites who avoided military service but are all to quick to send young men off to war. And what of other nations? We have meddled in the affairs of others, often because of our “economic interests”. Translate that phrase to our greed and avarice for a lion’s share of the world’s resources.

While other nations seek accords to lessen man’s impact on the environment our nation seeks its own direction of “America First.” If that is who we are as a county, so be it, but let’s not pretend to be a world leader, respectful of others and a friend to all.

Are other countries better than us? No. But America is not better than every country. And there are those from whom we could learn. One example is Bhutan where Gross National Happiness is the national measure rather than Gross Domestic Product, where its people do seem happier than many Americans.

So many of us are self-centered, egotistical, narrow-minded, and have high opinions of ourselves, believing we are better than we are. I don’t hold myself as better than others. I recently read an article asking the question of whether Trump may be the president we deserve. I think as abhorrent as he is, the answer to that question may be ‘yes’.

Mirrors

Mirrors

                                     

Mirrors. What do you see, or who do you see when you look in the mirror?

I use a mirror every day, but I usually do not look very closely. I don’t want to see the crazy wild hairs that sprout here and there. I don’t want my spreading middle. I don’t want to use a extra mirror to monitor the growing bald spot on the back of my head. After all, if I don’t see it, it doesn’t exist, right?

But I notice the blemishes and faults of others. Too heavy. Too skinny. Whatever. A litany of judgment.

How is our perception so clear and sharp when it comes to others, and yet so limited when directed at ourselves? Most often it seems our concept of ourself is inflated, though there are instances when a person sees a false negative image, such as one with an eating disorder who sees a fat self.

What if we had a mirror to see our soul, our thoughts and desires?

Pride, lust, greed, envy, lust, wrath and sloth – the traditional 7 deadly sins. Guilty to all 7, as well as a host of others.

Pride is the pinnacle. It was regarded as such traditionally, and I second that from experience. It has led me to exalted ego, inconsideration of others, justification for my actions no matter that they may harm others. After all, doesn’t Pride tell me that my happiness paramount, my self-interest before all?

I learned of the Monastery of the Holy Spirit in Conyers, Georgia almost 20 years ago in an article in the Atlanta Journal Constitution. I had left the Catholic Church, led first by intellectual searching and criticism, and then down a road that culminated in shame of return. I slowly made my return, and in 2005 first visited the monastery. It was not easy to go to a monastery for a retreat, particularly a Trappist monastery. The Trappists (Cistercian Order of the Strict Observance) are an ancient monastic order. They follow the rule of St. Benedict, a life of work and prayer, a vow of stability to the monastic place they have chosen. The Divine Office today is prayed at 4, 7, 9, 12:15, 3, 5:20 and 7:30. Years ago, as recently as the ‘60s, there was a prayer at 2 a.m. Also, silence was rigorous, often mistaken for a vow of silence. Though not a vow, sign language was used, and speech was limited to confession or a conference with a superior. Trappists to my generation were regarded as the Marine Corps of the Church. I think you may understand why a lapsed Catholic would fear a Trappist reception.

How wrong I was in so many ways. I have found the monks to be most forgiving and understanding. They are very much from the tradition Richard Rohr writes of in ‘Falling Upward’ – that is a crisis, failure, falling, is impetus for spiritual growth and breakthrough. I am much happier with who I see in the mirror these days. What does your mirror reflect?

I will write more of my failures, but before writing of my impressions of anyone else I thought I should speak honestly about myself.

In the early morning of Vigils, the psalms speak beautifully, powerfully and to the heart, like a laser. Psalm 51 is especially poignant to a sinner.

Psalm 51

Be gracious to me, O God, according to Your lovingkindness;
According to the greatness of Your compassion blot out my transgressions.
2Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity
And cleanse me from my sin.
3For I know my transgressions,
And my sin is ever before me.
4Against You, You only, I have sinned
And done what is evil in Your sight,
So that You are justified when You speak
And blameless when You judge.
5Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
And in sin my mother conceived me.
6Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being,
And in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom.
7Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8Make me to hear joy and gladness,
Let the bones which You have broken rejoice.
9Hide Your face from my sins
And blot out all my iniquities.
10Create in me a clean heart, O God,
And renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11Do not cast me away from Your presence
And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.
12Restore to me the joy of Your salvation
And sustain me with a willing spirit.
13Then I will teach transgressors Your ways,
And sinners will be converted to You.
14Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, the God of my salvation;
Then my tongue will joyfully sing of Your righteousness.
15O Lord, open my lips,
That my mouth may declare Your praise.
16For You do not delight in sacrifice, otherwise I would give it;
You are not pleased with burnt offering.
17The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.
18By Your favor do good to Zion;
Build the walls of Jerusalem.
19Then You will delight in righteous sacrifices,
In burnt offering and whole burnt offering;
Then young bulls will be offered on Your altar.